Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Random thoughts.

Yesterday , i did a little test. I walked right past you, to see if you would notice or see me. Hoping that you'll call out to me. You didn't =( .

Well yea , you were chatting with your friends while walking. When our paths crossed, i saw from the corner of my eye, you were facing my direction. Haha perhaps i'm just like the background of a picture, always there, but never noticed. Or maybe i'm just an insignificant person in your life.

Oh well, it doesn't matter anyway ( IT MATTERS !!! T.T ) , damn i should have just waved and said "Hi", lol the thick-headed idiot that is me . I'll put it out of my mind, at least until Tomorrow's presentation and stuff are cleared.

Come on, just 1 more day, 1 more day and its holidays. Then again.. i won't get to see you when there's no school. Holy cow, this is some serious BS, i want and don't want it to be holidays.

Sometimes i wonder when i think of you... do you ever think of me ?

Right.. *slap slap* snap out of it man, lets not start getting all emo and stuff

A drop of feelings that can't be put into words, cold and dry, it disappears, hey
Even if the world tried to go crazy with lies, I probably wouldn't care
Somewhere in this world I'm singing, and please let you be laughing somewhere in this world

Monday, August 30, 2010

WTH ???

Seriously ? 'F' for NEC project , you gotta be freakin kidding me, i think at the very least i should get a passing mark ? This is bloody ridiculous. Thanks ar Leon, salute you =_=.
So after a productive day, comes a totally unproductive day.

Did absolutely nothing for the whole day, started sorting photos @ 11+ and finally got into the mood and started drawing @ midnight and into the wee hours ~

Its kinda easier to concentrate late at night when its all quiet i suppose.



A girlfriend the color of water
A girlfriend the color of rain
Someday return your tears to the sky
Glimmering, twinkling
Wavering, swaying
When I'm with you like that

A girlfriend the color of rainbows
A girlfriend the color of dreams
Your smile will cross over the rainbow and reach me

Saturday, August 28, 2010

A lil bit of time to breath.

Finished MoGraph, Finished editting pictures. Halfway thru drawing. Its going pretty well.
Gonna finish all my drawing tomorrow. And maybe get started on some Ideation stuff.

Yeap, its been a pretty productive day if i do say so myself.

Got some spare cash lying around after paying my bills, so i'm wondering what i should spend it on ? Hmm.. or save it for future exploits since there's quite a few events coming up that i'm rather interested in.

Spica- Plastic Tree

Thursday, August 26, 2010

The calm after the storm ?

Well, after chatting with you on msn until 3am, i guess we're still the same as before.

Maybe, just maybe, i've gotten a lil bit closer to you. ^^ For that, I'm satisfied for now.

when i look at you my face gets red
when i see you my heart goes thump thump
i talk with shyness like a kid
when i look at you i just smile out of nowhere
like a fool I keep doing that
I think love came to me



I've finally got started on Mograph. It's tough, but i think i can do a decent job at least, with some help from video copilot.

today's MV

Kagrra, - Utakata

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Mixed feelings part 2

Damn damn damn damn damn. Why do i feel such negative emotions. The intense jealousy against those who get to see you on a regular basis. I don't want to feel this way, but dammit i can't stop.

You are in my mind every waking hour and then some. Every night i just toss and turn around on the bed, trying to fall asleep, but i can't. For some reason, you even appeared in my dream last night.

Your beautiful smile, and the adorable way you pout. My heart, my soul, it feels like they're trying to burst out of this mortal cage , transcend physical limitations, fly through the air to join you, to be by your side, no matter where you are. Just to be close to you, to hold your hand.

I can't go on like this. But i don't know what i should do, what i can even do.

Feel like screaming, but my voice is lost to me. The tears that won't fall from my eyes, are they flowing from the sky instead ?

If you mean that we don't know each other well enough yet, then please, please give me the chance to get to know you better.

I don't want to end it like this. Filled in my head, are only thoughts of you, so much so that i can't think of anyone else.

The feelings that i am unable to express, they are exploding in my chest- what will it take, to make my feelings known.

Even then comes more questions, more doubts.

How will it end ? Bliss ? or Heartbreak ?

Do i really want to know what you really think about me ? I'm afraid to find out. Sometimes i wish that i didn't fall for you. My life would be so much less complex then.

" Goodbyes are hard, but it'll be because we'll be happier the next time we see each other " That's the way it is for me, i wonder, i wonder if you feel the same ..

I know its pointless and stupid, but here i am, foolishly writing words for you, My feelings into text that you will never see.




Turning, turning, my heart again in the night,
In the darkness, searches for you
Darling, beloved,
I don’t know how long before the light goes out
I don’t need defined things somehow
Sadness is drawn out through tears
It’s alright. That’s just me.
With an empty right palm.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Mixed feelings and confused thoughts

I want to see you so badly, i want to tell you how i feel, i'm dead serious about you, even though it probably doesn't seem that way.

The effect you have on me, its like an elixir. I can be tired or not feeling well or a mixture, but just seeing your face, even for just a moment puts a smile on my face, invigorates me and gets me through the day.

Perhaps I'm trying to go too fast. It has after all been just a little bit over 2 months since i met you.
Perhaps i shouldn't have asked you out so soon. Now, I can't even send a simple sms. I want to talk to you, to get closer, to know you better, but I'm afraid. Afraid of all the possible negatives rolling around in my head.

I want to know what you think of me, but I'm afraid to ask, like the coward that i am.

I don't know what to do. I can't stop thinking about you.



In this unreliable, cruel world, uncertainty is the only certainty.


Alone again
A world I can’t rely on.
Round and round, how long does it spin?
My swirling heart’s a rainbow.
Searching for you in my memories is a mistake!
Your skirt flutters as you spread your wings, you, dream, illusion.
Tiresome tears spill all over my face.
Can I go looking for you again?
Hello, hello
You and I are out there somewhere,
Wonderful world.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

_l_

Totally shitty day. Screw it.
spent 6 hours stoning in front of adobe after effects.
watch singapore lose to some pathetic cheaters.

I'm not happy, not happy at all, but still i'm smiling. Just WTF is wrong with me. I'm such a fake person seriously, so goddamned disappointed with myself.

bad bad day.



In the end , i'm probably just a loner

Natsumatsuri

It was enjoyable =)

Chimney bread was interesting, nice to eat, but kinda dry

$1 hot dog at the end

and then off to simei for another round of food.

now i'm hungry again =(


*it was only 2 hours or so, but i really enjoyed being around you*

Friday, August 20, 2010

work work work

I swear i'm gonna start drawing and doing my assignments tomorrow.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

=DDDDDDD

Today i'm happy for reasons known only to myself.

Smile



smiling makes everything better =D, so

smile smile smile
If that’s how it is, try to smile with your whole body all the more!
So smile smile smile
Laugh off the sad times too! oh oh
smile smile smile
Give this universally unbeatable prescription a try!
So smile smile smile
Precisely because you might lose your way, be yourself at those times

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Alone again, wonderful world

Honestly , one of the most beautiful songs lyrical wise that i have ever heard.

Alone again , Wonderful world - Plastic Tree



Guess I won’t ever see you again.
This can’t be happening.
It’s like I’ve forgotten how to sleep as well.
In any case, this isn’t a dream.
You’re not here.
Ah, I need you.
I’m hurt.
Something’s happening to me.
The distance that prevents us from touching
And the passing days that pile up
Are where we’re being separated.

The chord of sadness is a roar.
I can’t even hear your voice, it won’t reach me.
The rustling wind smells sweet, sweet——.

Alone again
A world I can’t rely on.
Round and round, how long does it spin?
My swirling heart’s a rainbow.
Can I see you again?
Hello, hello
If you can hear me
Mischievous wonderful world.

Hey, I think about you all the time and call out your name.
My voice is echoing.
Midday moon.
A solitary answer comes to mind and almost vanishes.

A remnant of the painful mode.
I can’t even see your face, can’t recognize it.
The rustling wind laughs, laughs——.

Your skirt moves back and forth as you spread your wings, you, dream, illusion.
Tiresome tears spill all over my face.
If I can go looking for you again
Hello, hello
Where are you?
Spiteful wonderful world.

Today, sorrow is renewed again.
Tomorrow, sentimentality is still being approved.

Ah, even if I’m just grasping blindly in the future, at least it’ll be a new day.
I must look like a fool.
Beyond my tears, what are you saying to scold me?

Alone again
A world I can’t rely on.
Round and round, how long does it spin?
My swirling heart’s a rainbow.
Searching for you in my memories is a mistake!
Your skirt flutters as you spread your wings, you, dream, illusion.
Tiresome tears spill all over my face.
Can I go looking for you again?
Hello, hello
You and I are out there somewhere,
Wonderful world.

bla -

Cos i'm just honestly the most no-life person i know. My weekend consists of waking up at 12 noon and stoning around and wasting time in general

Friday, August 13, 2010

Dilemnas dilemnas

Aggro gets boring fast, control gets tediously long sometimes. gonna try something more midrange-ish next.

Games day tomorrow.. should i play ? Testing results haven't been good, doesn't look promising for me to play. Bloody inconsistent.

Forgot the submit sketches along with the other stuff, but oh well whatever.

Curry chicken donut - nice but kinda oily.

Short on cash as always =(

ps - missin ya

Thursday, August 12, 2010

1st completed project + randoms


Yay finally completed the NEC project + report. All that's left is to mount it up and submit it.
Took me a few hours to do , no help from lousy laptop's slow liquifying profess. Had to run around SG to get all the stuff i needed ( mounting board, tools and printing ), what a friggin bother. At least its finally done with.

Photography next week, need borrow camera from JQ.

Now that i've the time i should start to pick up my guitar again. Last time i tried learning was in aprit before school began. And i've promptly forgotten all of the few bits of basic stuff i've learnt.

random magic - BSA is a freakin house
Sun titan recurring o-rings on vengevines is g@y

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Dedicated to JJJ-P

I didn't cry the day i broke my teeth
I didn't think that I could feel this pain
Until I saw my front teeth on the floor
Whatever happened to my common sense
And the somethin' that i flamed about k-pop
Tell me how
Help me say the words out loud

Could it be
That nothings gonna change
Cause time has got a way of taking back
Everything you thought you had
Can you see
The teeth i used to have
The ones I lost when I jumped down the seats
Oh whatever happened to
my front teeth
Ooh ooh
Ooh ooh

I need to wake up from this state of mind
The situation is the same kind
I gotta get your memory out of my head
Would you catch me if I had to fall
Would you even find the time for that at all
Tell me how
Help me say the words out loud

Could it be
That nothings gonna change
Time has got a way of taking back
Everything you thought you had
Can you see
the teeth i used to have
The ones I lost when I jumped down the seats
Oh whatever happened to
my front teeth
Ooh ooh
Ooh ooh

Cause time has taken back
Everything I thought we had

my front teeth..

Could it be
Nothings gonna change
Cause time has got a way of taking back
Everything you thought you had
Can you see
the teeth i used to have
The ones I lost when I jumped down the seats
Oh whatever happened to
my front teeth
Ooh ooh
Ooh ooh



hehehe stroke of genius if i do say so myself